Don't know what to do...

     Let's just say it's a long story... and leave it at that.

I'm so scared... the only thing that got me to fall asleep was crying, and surprisingly hugging a stuffed animal.

I shouldn't have looked back. I can't get it out of my head! it could've been me. I can't believe that. It just blows my mind that it happened... That it might happen again without help. I can't say any more other then these..

Terrify: to fill with terror or alarm; make greatly afraid.

Fury: violent or uncontrolled anger; wild rage

Destroy: to be destructive or cause destruction

Hurt: to feel or suffer bodily or mental pain or distress

Stress: distress or uneasiness of mind caused by fear of danger or misfortune. 

I honestly don't know what else to do. I showed my parents my testimony and i really didn't go as I thought it should have... After listening to what they said about it I don't feel as though my testimony is of any worth. 

It's funny how right after you feel so great, and say you won't feel like crap. Something happens to make you feel like crap. 

It's just the rain before the sunshine... Right?.. I shouldn't be so hypocritical. I can't even take my own advice. 

I don't really feel like this blog post is going anywhere. I thought that writing about it would make me feel better. It usually does, don't get me wrong, but I don't feel any better right now..